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Mignon & The Mob
Sir Jables: I cut into a $23.00 filet mignon at this restaurant my wife and I were eating at, and immediately realized it one of those pieced-together things they sell at the grocery store for a fraction of what real filets go for. When I sent it back, they didn't ask any questions, but, when the bill came it was still on there. I refused to pay and the owner stormed out and started yelling at me in broken Italian right there in the middle of the restaurant. My old lady and I
PDA and Mass-Shooters
Sir Jables: Occasionally, a couple will come into the restaurant where I work, and sit on the same side of the table so they can make out for the entire restaurant to see. It’s tacky and gross. Why do you think some people feel compelled to do this? —Kara Dear Kara: You think that’s tacky and gross? Imagine how that vinyl booth cover feels. Also tacky and gross, I’d imagine. And I mean tacky and gross in the sticky sense. If you’re asking for reasons beyond them simply being
Cold Burgers and Masochists
[Ed. note: Sir Jables' column is a day late this week because I dropped the fucking ball. Won't happen again.] Sir Jables: I wait tables at a casual-dining restaurant. A woman and her husband came in yesterday and she ordered a burger with a side salad (which is served on the same plate in our restaurant). She complained that the salad was on the same plate as the burger, so I had the items re-plated separately, which took all of 1 minute to do. When I returned she complained
Poe & Napalm
Sir Jables: I’m a server at a very busy restaurant where there is limited space for servers to walk. This wouldn’t be such a problem if the parents who come in to eat with their children would keep their kids from running free around the restaurant, but some do not. It seems to be a growing issue. How should this be handled? Dear _______, Napalm. See, but that’s a one-word answer. And one-word answers to do not, a column, make. So I guess we have to delve deeper into th
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